Jonesing On All the Wrong Things

You talk about Jonesing...this is all I hear.

I met a Joneser. After talking with him (nicest guy), the wife asked me if I was going to write a blog post about it. I said no...but then thought about it while showering. So, here is the break down. My buddy is good at remembering prices, and the wife was feeling it was coming off as Jonesing.

He was complaining that their kiddo had broken another TV, costing them either $400-$500 (I don't remember which he said). He also bought a TV mount to go with it from Walmart for $75. And his fishing gear was worth $600. I was impressed he had awareness of how much the stuff he was buying cost.

Here is what I came away with. Jonesing isn't allocating money well. Wow, I know. You say "how deep Bravely Content! I would have never found that out alone!". Let me explain. As we know, Jonesing is buying stuff you don't need to impress people you don't like. This kind fellow also shared that his wife and him spent about $600 on their one kiddo for Christmas. My wife and I spend under $200 for all Christmas gifts this year (yes. Still is a lot). But, this did not bother me on a personal level which comes to the second observation.

The second thing I came away with is that I automatically sort purchases I hear to how urgently needed they are, and the price. I don't personally feel like a second class citizen when someone is allocating their money unnecessarily or poorly. In fact, I feel shame when I hear someone bad assing their budget or purchases. That is something I envy.

Must...shred...all...money!

No giant rant today, Just an observation that I've become so disconnected with the Jones's, that Jonesing just seems wasteful to me but doesn't trigger jealousy. When Yukon's and Suburban's floor it next to me while I am biking, all I hear is money being shredded and a guy panting "must...shred...all...money."

This is what the Chevy looks like

One other funny observation. There is a giant brand new Chevy Suburban that regularly is driven to an event the wife and I go to. I didn't feel less of a man parking next to it in my '97 Honda. I felt bad for the guy's finances, and happy for the salesman who got a fat payoff. On a personal level though, I still do feel angry when I see that Chevy running, without anyone inside or in sight. As if shredding money when driving isn't enough, this guy goes the extra mile and shreds money when he isn't even around! It's like reverse compounding interest.

Not Keeping Up With The Jones's

Money does not solve everything

Tonight, my wife asked me what this blog was for. It is about enjoying a full and rich life instead of distractions. Abandoning the pursuit of wealth is a bit like calling yourself off of a race you cannot win. There is always someone richer than you, and if you are the richest guy in town, often you have sacrificed the people and relatives in your life.

What is better to maintain, everything you need or everything you want? Sure, it would be cool to own a fleet of cars, but the upkeep on them would take much of your time. You could hire someone to take care of them, but then you would probably worry about that guy scratching one, or stealing your bank account info from his paycheck.

What if...and just entertain this, you had what you needed, but did not have to worry about more than that? What if you keep your worrying at a minimum and focus where you are at, in the correct time?

I know some people of the Jones descent who don't worry. They are like wealthy people, minus the wealth, and are relying on credit. The problem with borrowing from the future is that eventually the future comes, and you must pay.

The old friend

In many modern-day Jones family's, both parents work full time and the kids go to school and come home to a nanny. The kids miss out on genetic role models, while the parents roll the dice on a school and nanny. The parents may be very successful at their jobs, but the family portion of their life is incomplete. As the kids and parents age, it is a bit like seeing an old friend that you have a hard time relating to. Simply starting a conversation is difficult, and can quickly become an awkward argument.

A rich life that I picture is one where one parent works and the other chooses what to do with their free time. Maybe they work part of the time or volunteer, but the second parent is physically around the children for most of their life. Work is important. Family is important too. Neither should be ignored. However, I believe that worrying about money is unimportant.

If you are able to get to a state where you have a budget and know what you are working toward, then you can eliminate one of the most common causes of stress and divorce. That is simple living. That is what I want. I believe that part of you wants to exit the rat race, figure out what truly is important in your life, and pursue that instead of wasting time.

Why would I trade time with Emma
for worrying about stuff?

Living rich is to have more of what is important, like having more time, making deep relationships, having few things to worry about and making great memories. That is the life I want. Not the life of the Jones's where possessions are the sum of success. I would rather take pictures of my Emma and Grace, than worry about purchasing the latest boat, phone or any other false promise of happiness.

Please note that I do not believe all purchases are wasteful as many things in life are needed.